Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
