they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
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