It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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