I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Be still, my beating vagina.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
