He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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