She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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