**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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