You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
