First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize