True but thats because hes a fetus.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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