This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
