I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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