I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
