it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
