Jerry, you need to find god
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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