her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
operation harelip BJ is a go
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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