**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
