i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize