If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
