Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
