so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
the day after is always just damage control
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
