why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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