are you so shy because you have an std?
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
