But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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