Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
