ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
