I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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