It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
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