i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
