I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
