So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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