You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
