sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
