I must be too annoying 4 u.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
