there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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