You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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