You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
