What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize