his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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