a queef is a wish your heart makes.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
