Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Randomize
