seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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