He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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