Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
