Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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