We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Drunk is a universal language darling
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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