So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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