hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
