Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
