We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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